HOME     LOGIN     CREATE ACCOUNT     SSW HELP CENTER  

History, according to Vonbek the chronically hallucinating, The Eastern Stars

Secret Society Wars  »  The Popsickle's Guide To The Universe

  • Posted By: Vonbek  homeworld | blog | gallery | player profile

    History, according to Vonbek the chronically hallucinating, The Eastern Stars
    From the Fabricati diem, the book of the Order of the Eastern Star:
    In the dawn of time, when the world was new, the first people was a lazy and complacent flock. Though all living necessities were provided for, something was amiss in the new world. Though the parents of the vile Illuminati maintained that the orderly world was good, Our Parents were restless, filled with the energy of the new world, seeking release. One fateful day, a sign was given onto our parents. A fruit, fallen from the tree that bore it, was spotted on the otherwise orderly grounds of the first new world. Clearly it was the sign from the Originator. The Originator was tired of the stark orderly world in which the first people were placed and has disturbed the orderly world with the fallen fruit, the lone symbol of entropy in that too orderly world. Understanding perfectly what the Originator has intended, one of Our Parents, Blargh Harabashi the First, took up the fruit of entropy and propagated the Originators intent by flinging it at a recumbent, dozing member of parents of the vile Illuminati. Thus began the first battle between our order and that of the vile Illuminati.

    The Order of the Eastern Star was one of the original two societies to arise from the early beginnings of the world. They firmly believe that the world is based on the laws of chaos, or entropy. Where all actions of world beings shall be a reflection of pure entropy, unrestricted by any forces of order or law. Ever since the first split, as retold above in Fabricati diem, the Order of the Eastern Star has being in constant conflict against the Illuminati, a society that believes through order and law will come paradise and utopia.

    Some of the greatest events in history was perpetrated by the Order of the Eastern Star. Their first success was introducing the theory of the Big Bang, held dogmatic by the greatest minds of the universe as the true birth of the universe for the majority of the first and second millennium (until it was revealed that the theory was indeed a poorly executed off-coloured joke about a cheerleader, a rabbi, and a priest). This revelation and eventual discrediting of the Big Bang theory was brought about by the Illuminati, who, until this day, claim it as one of their sacred victories.

    Powerful and ancient though the Order of the Eastern Star was, it's strict adherence to the laws of entropy and chaos inevitably caused a unpredicted split within it's members. Some members within the Order of the Eastern Star grew tired of the unpredictability and begun craving some orderly governance. In the year 1712, the Triad Cabal, under the leadership of a shadowy figure called der alte Fritz was formed from members within the ranks of the Order of the Eastern Star, and internal struggle between the adherents of the Triad Cabal and the Order of the Eastern Star begun in earnest. The struggle that ensued lasted a hundred years. At the end of the struggle, the Order of the Eastern Star finally formed an uneasy truce with the Triad Cabal and focused their energy upon their common enemy, the Illuminati.

    When peace finally came between the Triad Cabal and the Order of the Eastern Star, it was discovered that der alte Fritz was in fact an Illuminati Grand Master named Paul the First. Paul the First was installed within the ranks of the Order of the Eastern Star by the Illuminati Grand Poo-bah Frederick Hohenzollern I. Taking this fact to heart, the Order of the Eastern Star, in the year 1812, sent into the ranks of the Illuminati a youth named Leonardo Enrico Xavier, the son to then Order of the Eastern Star Grand Poo-bah Dr. Charles Francis Xavier. From that time on, Leonardo Enrico Xavier, under the nom de guerre of Agent Lex, began a campaign of instilling a bit of disorder and chaos into the minds of the Illuminati members. Agent Lex became, in the year 1852, the first Grand Poo-bah of the Society of the Oddfellows, causing a further 120 years of warfare between the Illuminati and the Society of the Oddfellows.

    In the midst of struggles between the Order of the Eastern Star and the Illuminati, partly due to the subterfuge which brought to life the Triad Cabal and the Society of the Oddfellows, was sown the seeds of the Order of the Amaranth.